The end of The Jedi

The end of Return of the Jedi still pisses me off. After all the sci-fi Endor goodness of speeder bike chases and cool-looking moss-covered AT-ATs, it all has to finish on a fucking Ewok bonfire. It wouldn't annoy me so much if I didn't know it was originally supposed to be a planet full of wookies. And those drums made of Stormtrooper helmets? No way. The Empire would have kicked seven shades of furball infused shit out of these little bear-men and burnt their stupid tree-house to the ground. A planet full of Wookies? Game on. That's a fight.

We were almost treated to a planet full of Wookies on a couple of occasions. The first being the stuff of fables: The Star Wars Summer Special. On the off-chance you don't know about this, it was an attempt to cash in on the runaway freight train of a hit that Star Was became. It was released a year later in 1978 as a TV special and is a two-hour story revolving around Chewbacca needing to get back to his homeworld Kashyyyk to celebrate something called "Life Day". This is like the Wookie equivalent of the double bank holiday we were all treated to here in England when Kate & Wills got married. Four days off. Cheers!

Anyway, it's truly a complete load of arse. So much so that George Lucas apparently tried to get every single copy of it destroyed. And then along comes the revolution of digital film-making (that George ironically helped to invent) and the poor guy's got no chance. Copies everywhere. It's a fascinating watch though as it features all the stars of the original trilogy. Including, weirdly, a cartoon segment introducing Boba Fett. Bear in mind this is in 1978, some two years before we see Fett on-screen in Empire.

We also get introduced to Chewbacca's family including his son, Lumpy. If I ever have a son I'm calling him Lumpy.

Pretty spectacular eh? Lets see poor Harrison Ford trying to work with this frankly awful script.

We were treated to the spectacle of a planet full of Wookies at war with the empire again in 2005 with the Revenge of the Sith, but by then nobody really cared and the kind of excitement that the picture below would have engendered to a young me back in 1984 just evaporated in a puff of cynicism.

PS: I still love Return of the Jedi and shouts out to thecrow65 over at Deviantart for the Ewok target image.